The holidays are a joyful time, but they can also be stressful, often involving family get-togethers, travel, special events, and traditions that are unique to each family. When a family is divided into separate households due to divorce, it adds another layer of anxiety to the holiday mix. How do divorced parents with shared custody develop a workable plan for sharing their children during the holidays? Speak to our proven divorce attorney in Denver, CO for a free case evaluation.
Understanding Child Custody In Colorado
Colorado custody orders divide child custody into two portions: physical and legal custody. Physical custody refers to which parent a child resides with according to the parenting plan. In contrast, legal custody refers to decision-making authority, or which parent makes important decisions for the child, such as medical and educational choices.
The Colorado courts make all decisions in the best interests of the child. Under Colorado Rev. Stat. § 19-1-102(1), (1.5), the best interests standard includes the following goal:
“To preserve and strengthen family ties whenever possible.”
The court’s legal presumption is that continued close contact with both parents is in a child’s best interests, unless a parent proves otherwise. This continued close contact includes fairly divided time with both parents during the holidays.
Parents may choose or develop their own parenting-time schedule, including their holiday plan, or else they can take their disputes to court for a judge to decide and issue binding orders.
What are the Options for Holiday Parenting Plans?
Being apart from their children during a major holiday is not what any parent wants, but divorce makes periods of separation from children inevitable when parents share custody. Fortunately, there are options that allow each parent fair access to their children, including during the holidays.
Standard Shared Holiday Custody in Colorado
One of the most straightforward methods for shared holiday custody is to alternate years. For instance, if one parent has their child for Christmas one year, then the other parent gets the child the following year. Having this plan expressly signed into the custody agreement or court order eliminates conflict and allows all parties to understand what to expect for each holiday.
Alternating Holidays on Even and Odd Years
Another popular plan is to alternate major holidays. For example, one parent has the children for Christmas in even years and the other in odd years, while the other parent has the children for Thanksgiving during even years, and the other during odd years.
Fixed Holidays for Each Parent
Some parents have a special attachment or religious devotion that makes one holiday particularly important to them. In this case, if both parents agree, they may choose a fixed holiday schedule.
For instance, one parent may wish to have their child every Easter, while another parent has their child every Hanukkah, or one parent may want their child every Thanksgiving because they have family reunions on that date, while the other parent has an annual Halloween party and wishes to have their children on Halloween. When parents can communicate and compromise, they can reach an agreement on a fixed holiday schedule.
Flexible Parenting Plans for Parents Who Can Communicate and Compromise Effectively
Finally, in the best-case scenario, parents can create a parenting time schedule that allows for flexibility over the holidays. A flexible holiday parenting plan allows parents to discuss their holiday plans before each holiday and choose the plan that works best for them for that particular holiday.
For instance, if a parent has special plans for Christmas Day and wishes to have their children, both parents can work out an effective compromise. They could decide that one parent has the children on Christmas Eve, and the other on Christmas Day, or one parent could choose to celebrate their Christmas on the day after the actual holiday.